More things you shouldn't text a girl that you're trying to date...
Let's talk about your over use of the word "Righteous."
I'm 100% sure you grew up in Utah your entire life. So unless you've "shred some nar" in a place that isn't completely landlocked. Speak English!
Just because you can handle some "pow" for about 5 months out of the year that there's snow on the ground, that doesn't make you a bro.
And I'm definitely NOT your bro.